I haven’t read 50 Shades of Grey. I know, I know…I’ve heard lots of people saying, well, you have to read it if you are to offer an opinion. I think that’s how it became a bestseller. So I won’t offer an opinion, and I don’t want to read it. But you might want to know that the great Molly Parkin – painter, writer, artist – did it properly a long time ago. In the 1970s, she wrote a series of comic erotic novels beginning with Love All, which has just been republished in e-book form by Pilot Productions, and is available here. Looking at the Amazon site today, it was selling for £1.66, which has got to be good value for fine writing, good humour, and lashings of spanking hot sizzle. Makes contemporary attempts look positively grey.